Who's to Blame?

When it comes to stress in modern America, one would think it to be non-existent. After all, we have so many technological advances to make our lives easier and everything is more convenient. Problem is easier doesn't make better. There seems to be opposing forces at work in our society - as our technology advances, our character weakens. Because we have chosen in so many instances to take the "easy" way out, we have become weak and flabby in our character, the very thing that made us the great nation we were. So who's to blame in this stressed out world? Funny thing about stress - our forefathers worked harder longer and for less benefit, yet they didn't seem to have the stress problem we do. What is stress? Another word for stress is tension, which is best defined by that awkward feeling one has when in a room with two or more people who everyone knows are at odds with each other and all are awaiting the confrontation. Contention is another good synonym. Proverbs 13:10 explains where contention originates:

Only by pride cometh contention: but with the well-advised is wisdom.

Stress; tension; contention - these terms are pretty much synonymous by modern day usage. What is at the root of them all? - pride. Argue it anyway you may, it all boils down to me not liking the situation, whether that involves people, circumstances, or things. Our homes are no different. It is time we stop blaming the kids for the stress level in our homes and remind ourselves of where our children learn their behavior. The older I get and the more I learn of people, it's almost humorous how we blame things on the kids, yet we are merely reaping what we have sown. If our children are rude, they learned it from us. If our children are rebellious, they're just a chip off the old block. May I offer an observation, followed by a solution.
We struggle to control our children, because we struggle to control ourselves. In I Timothy 3 is the list of qualifications for a pastor; verses 4-5 mention the idea that he must rule his own house. Well, if one cannot rule himself, he will not rule his house. And as it says, if he can't rule his house how can he rule the church of God? Many ministries have been ruined due to men who could not or would not rule themselves. Well, you may say, I don't plan on pastoring a church. No, but are you planning on pastoring(leading, shepherding) your home. that was my observation; here very simply is my solution - let us rule ourselves. Think about this statement - The more one governs himself, the less need he has of outside governing forces; the less one governs himself, the more he requires an outside force to govern him. This is based on two verses from the book of Proverbs. I leave them for you in closing:

Proverbs 16:32 -
He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.

Proverbs 25:28 -
He that hath no rule over his own spirit is like a city that is broken down, and without walls.

Stressed Out!

This week's question concerns STRESS and how our young people see the stress level in their homes. We will look at two questions from the questionnaire that read as follows:

1.)On a scale of 1-10, 10 being fingernails on a chalkboard, I would say the tension between me and my parents is a: _________

2.)On the same scale, I would say the tension between my parents is a __________

I grouped the answers as 1-3 Little to None, 4-7 rather consistent, 8-10 Extreme high levels. Here are the results:

Question One: Little to None...59% Rather Consistent...25%, Extreme High Levels...16%

Question Two: Little to None...54%, Rather Consistent...22%, Extreme High Levels...24%

Thus we learn from our IFB young people that the tension between them and their parents is for over half rather non existent, 25% feel they have a rather consistent tension between them and their parents, while only 16% feel an extreme level of tension between them and their parents. Shouldn't that be much lower in our IFB homes? Are you feeling stressed?
It is interesting to note that the question 2 results nearly mirror the question one results, except our young people feel more of their parents are having some serious tension.
In my life, in my experience in serving in the ministry (youth ministry, bus ministry, school ministry, pastor...)I can unfortunately testify that too many of our homes are places of tension and struggle rather than peace and security. I have heard and hear far more "AAAHHH, I am about at my wits end" than I do "What a joy my family is." I've been to too many homes to break up fights than I wish to share. Children talking bad about their parents and vice versa. Ahhh, the stress!
It breaks our hearts to hear children speak indignantly about their parents, as it also does to hear parents constantly seeking ways to avoid spending time with their children.
Too many dads are shaking hands with others at church while going out of their way to be kind to every brother and sister; but they can't find a good word to say at home. Fighting, yelling, slamming doors, silence, and whimpers seemingly are more common than singing, praying, and laughing in our homes. Work, bills, practice, school, meetings are constant; while money, sharing, conversing, and unity are missing. The stress is overwhelming!
We will save the "divorce: right or wrong" debate for a later time; but this I know-The Lord hates divorce (Mal. 2:16). If the Lord hates something, we should do our best to avoid it at all cost. Yet, Baptist homes are being torn apart daily by the vice of divorce. Usually this is centered on the fact that an individual (or both) are not being pleased. We even read of children seeking divorces from their parents due to a lack of being 'loved', money issues, and even the parent not buying their child a nintendo (http://www.medindia.net/news/Children-too-Divorce-Their-Parents-in-US-Will-It-Catch-Up-in-India-Too-36548-1.htm). Are you stressed yet?
Quick marriage Advice from Ephesians 5 and 6: Husbands, your example is Christ. Everything that Christ is to the church, so we should be to our wives (Counsel, Strength, Nurturer, Forgiver, Sustainer, Empowerer, Answer, Love...). Husbands love our wives as Christ loved us. Wives, Submit and Reverence Your Husband. Allow him to be the head of the home and act upon it. Praise him for the work he does for the home. Children, obey and honour your parents (no exception clauses given). Fathers, don't provoke your children to wrath, but admonish them (quit calling them 'stupid' and correct them in ways that create a desire in them to serve our Lord.) The stress is easing off.
Let's start doing things the Bible way and claim the promises of God. Fathers, get the hearts of your children by first turning your hearts towards them. Let's give up our Tuesday softball night, fishing with the men on Friday night, and golf game somewhere between, and read a book with our daughter. Let's turn off the T.V. one night and talk. Let's all sit around the supper table and eat together. Let's end the night sitting on the porch with a White Castle Iced Tea (or Sonic) with a breeze blowing softly, trying to count the lightning bugs that are in the yard. Ahh, stress subsiding.
Mom's lets give up the extra curriculars and have dinner ready a few times this week that was actually cooked on a stove or in an oven and not in a microwave or a drive thru window. Let's have the clothes set out the night before with the belt and both shoes rather than have the stressed out clothes scavenger hunt every morning. Let's sing while we fold the laundry, and teach your daughter how to sew a button back on. O.k. maybe a little stress coming back on, but it's temporary and will lead to much more peace down the road.
The Home is to be a picture of Christ and the church. The home should be a picture of the love, peace, and joy that Christ brings to our lives. Sadly, this is not the case for too many of our homes. Instead of serenity, we have stress! Instead of peace, we have problems. Instead of laughing, we have loudness.
Dad and mom, strive to be Christ-like and the example of Godly love to your children. Children, honour and obey your parents, and communicate with them freely.
I believe the Devil hates the home for what it portrays, and our Lord takes the home and marriage seriously for what it portrays. God does not deal lightly with such (see Moses and striking the rock a second time). We need to reverence the home more, practice principles laid out in Scripture, and Cease the stress!

What a Crowd!

Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; Hebrews 12:1-2a

As Pastor Burke pointed out, the main reason for sports participation is pride. Let's be honest - it feels good to be in the spotlight. What else explains the modern trend of reality tv? The desire to be seen and known - pride. Here is our problem - we no longer look at life through the lens of Scripture. It is no longer a matter of "What does God's Word say about it?" Today we settle for
"Well, I don't see a problem with it." It is, quite simply, the difference between walking in the flesh and walking in the Spirit. It's time we get back to the basics, something we seem to have neglected the past few decades. Many have perhaps heard of the great basketball coach from UCLA's past, John Wooden. What many may not know is that while building a basketball dynasty, he was doing something far more important - bulding lives. He attributed his success not in what he won, but in what he was able to teach his players. He didn't just pay lip service to "winning isn't everything", he actually lived it. But he did it by teaching his players the importance of submitting themselves and denying themselves.

Now let me get back to my title and text. We are surrounded by a great cloud of witnesses. I have to wonder to myself at times, if they were able to observe what goes on down here, what would they think about how we are running the race? What would be their reaction to what they see? We would have to admit, I think, that they would not be that impressed; when the very faith that they died for, we can hardly muster up the energy to show up for; when the things they suffered torture and persecution for not denying, we can hardly deny ourselves a few minutes extra sleep for. Today in our church service we sang the old hymn "Faith of our Fathers." This stanza caught my eye -
Our fathers, chained in prisons dark, were still in heart and conscience free:
How sweet would be their children's fate, If they like them, could die for thee!
How far we've come! Would we pray that same pray for our young people? Would it be considered an honor for them to give their lives for the cause of the Savior? Can we be honest enough with ourselves to give an honest answer? What then, in this life, would be more important? Money? Security? Fame?

...who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God. Hebrews 12:2b

Sports Anonymous

"Hello, my name is America, and I am addicted to sports."
Now before I begin writing, let me make it clear...it is not a sin to play sports. Matter fact, it is a good thing to play sports and be active. Paul repeatedly used sports to illustrate the Christian life (racing, wrestling, etc). I enjoy baseball, I love watching a college basketball game (especially Kentucky), and hardly watch-but keep up with our beloved Cincinnati Bungles. I played one year of football in jr. high and 6 years of basketball while in school. I enjoy playing a game of non-serious softball with our church family, and I am enjoying teaching my son to throw and hit a baseball, catch a football, and take down the other boy he is wrestling. Having said all that, I try to enjoy these things in perspective. There are far more important things I want my son to learn than catching a football.
In the words of Voddie Vaucham (don't agree with alot...but the man can "BRING IT."),

'Our culture defines a man by the three B's: Ball field, Billfold, and Bedroom, but our culture is wrong. That is not how God defines a man.'

We are looking at Bro. Vaucham's first point...the ball field. America is obsessed with sports. Our children are being reared by foul-mouthed coaches more than their parents. "Coach" has the heart of too many of our young people.
Most who would play our school basketball team today would laugh, but there was a day-only a few years ago-when our boy's basketball team was 20-0 and champions of our league. I know, because I was an assistant coach. We had a very good basketball team.
Their week went like this: Monday & Wednesday: school 8:30-3:00; Practice 5:30-8:00
Thursdays: School and practice 8:30-4:30. Fridays and Tuesdays: school and games till late evenings. And in between times, most had a job, friends, and the occasional studying. See a problem here? Where is the family time. Where is the father getting the heart of the child? Sports are not evil and can be done correctly-but in America they have become a god.
In our local school district, they begin high school at 7:15 a.m. Why? To get in 3-4 hours of football practice a day after school. The typical class period last around an hour. The typical football/basketball practice last around 3 hours. When the school levy was voted down, what was it that was cut because of a lack of funds? Sports? Oh no! It was bus transportation and class room supplies.
I laugh at the before mentioned University of Kentucky. The president of the university, in charge of the care, administration, and education of America's future earned an amazing $550,000 in 2008. The university's basketball coach will make $5,000,000 this year. America has a problem.
Beyond the practice time, there is the pressure for success that leads to drug abuse and performance enhancers, and the destruction of America's schools and overall education.
America's sports addiction has led to radio stations designated only to sports, multiples of television stations dedicated only to sports, and our headlines of newspapers are covered with sports news. Congress, amidst a recession and war, meets to discuss baseball and steroids, BCS bowl games, and Roger Clemens.
We, as the Romans, are addicted.
Besides all this, every pastor would agree with me that the amount of church services missed because parents are at games or practices is destroying our young people's spiritual lives; and parents take off work and miss visitation to cheer them on! To what? A lack of reverence for the Lord's house and work, a lack of faithfulness to the ministry and services, and a loss of fellowship with God's people; but they do get a stronger relationship with the cursing coach, foul-mouthed spectating parents, and lost teammates with their dirty jokes and mouths.
So why do we insist they keep playing? According to our teens and this question from our questionnaire:

Why do you play sports?
A. To Win 26%
B. To get in Better shape 40%
C. Possibly go Pro 8%
D. Get My Stats Up 4%
E. Get Character 22%

For the most part, you could define the purpose of our young people playing as: Pride. Not only does sports separate our families a great while, but it also directly contradicts Scripture:

Be kindly affectioned one to another with brotherly love; in honour preferring one another; Romans 12:10
Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves. Phillipians 2:3

Having played for a Christian School for 6 years, and coached a Christian school for 7 years...not really the attitude I have seen on courts and fields.
I am NOT one of those that don't believe in keeping score....learning to handle defeat is necessary for life; but playing with a Biblical spirit is hardly evident today.
Sports are not a sin; but they can become one easily. America has become addicted to sports, and our IFB young people are not far behind. May we seek to allow Christ to have the Preeminence in our lives and families!

I did it my way

As I sit down to write this post, my heart is heavy. Reason being that, while its easy to look at the results of a poll and think how sad it is that there is such an inconsistency of believing the Bible and yet not following it, as I look back on my life and decisions I've made, I must admit its not as easy as it seems. Simple, yes; easy, no. One would think for a young person growing up in Christian circles that it would be second nature for that one to follow the principles and teachings of God's Word. That, however, is not the case. The question then follows, Why not? Many explanations could be given, but the simplest and most logical is that that young person, while perhaps told what to do and how to live, was not often enough shown. In other words, I've heard a lot of sermons on revival, but I've never actually seen anyone in a revival. We tell our youth to live according to God's Word, but are we showing them how to live accordingly?
Going back to my opening statement - looking back at decisions I have made not in accordance to God's Word, I must confess there are some things I wish I had done differently. I thank God for the wife that He gave me and wouldn't trade her for the world; but I think how much better of a husband I would be and how much better a relationship we would have had I listened to the Lord instead of my peers when it came to dating. I think how much money I wasted on purchases that I made without giving God a second thought on the matter. How many decisions could have been made for the glory and honor of the Lord that instead I now regret because I did it my way. And this is the hardest thing to live with - I knew exactly what I was doing. I cannot plead ignorance. This is never a viable excuse for a child of God, because if you have the Holy Spirit in you He will tell you exactly what you ought to do. Parents, we must teach our children to obey, to listen for that still small voice and then to heed it. We, then must set the example; we must be listening for His voice first. God forgive us for the many times we have ignored His Spirit; the times we knew He was telling us one thing and we went and did another. Let us humble ourselves, confess our sin of disobedience to God, receive the forgiveness He has waiting for us, and then we may teach others also.

There is a way which seemeth right unto a man, but the end thereof are the ways of death.
- Proverbs 14:12

It's Perfect, But I Don't Want It

Such a statement sounds ridiculous, does it not? How can something be truly perfect, but we would want no part of it? Yet, we see this over and over again in the spiritual lives of not only young people, but a majority of all people. We now will look at two questions from our questionnaire. The first reads as follows:

I believe the Bible to be true:
A. Completely 92%
B. Pretty Much 4%
C. Somewhat 3%
D. It's a joke 1%

Not a shocking result; pretty much as expected. 92% of our IFB young people believe the Bible to be completely true. There is a small percentage of those that are in doubt somewhat; but a vast majority agree the Bible is Completely True! The next question read as follows:

I follow the Bible in my life:
A. Completely 20%
B. Pretty Much 53%
C. Somewhat 23%
D. It's a joke 4%

Now, I appreciate the honesty, and would love to see the results of the same poll to all church members; but why the drop in percentage when it comes to obedience?
I thought, perhaps, that to say "completely" some may attribute that to perfection, and none of us are perfect. Perhaps, "pretty much" is the best we can do in the flesh. I truly doubt any of us can honestly say we are completely following the Bible in every aspect of our life, so my initial disgust was somewhat swayed after meditating on the results. Perhaps if I could do it again, the question would better read, "I attempt to follow the Bible in my life..."
Here are the facts: The Bible is the Word of God, it is completely true, and we should endeavor to follow the Bible with our lives completely! There is a word that is less used today, and even less practiced today; that word is loyalty. Herein lies a great problem for our churches and faith. Very few understand loyalty.
Most today in our churches would define loyalty as "sticking with the pastor" or "not missing church." That is not loyalty. True spiritual loyalty is submission to God's Word and faithfulness to it-no matter the cost.
This type of loyalty is seen in Joseph as he refused Potiphar's wife's temptations; in Moses as he 'refused to be called the son of Pharaoh's daughter'; in Daniel as he purposed in his heart that he would not defile himself. We need this kind of loyalty. The type of loyalty that allowed Stephen to be stoned, Mark drug to pieces, Paul and John the Baptist beheaded, Timothy beaten, Ignatius and Germanicus thrown to wild beast, and Polycarp to state: "Eighty and six years have I served Him and He never once wronged me, how shall I blaspheme my King who hath saved me?" as he stood before the flame of martyrdom.
Loyalty! Knowing God's Word is true and living in accordance to it. Paul expected loyalty in Colossians 1. After reminding the church at Colosse of just Who Jesus is and what He has done for us, he then stated in verse 23, "If ye continue in the faith grounded and settled, and be not moved away from the hope of the gospel which ye have heard..." That word "if" does not mean 'chance' but rather 'because of these things.' (Used in the same way as John 14 "if I go and prepare a place for you;" and 1 Cor. 15 "if Christ be risen from the dead...). Paul expected those who understood Who Jesus was and what He had done for them to be loyal to Him! This loyalty is, as Romans 12 reads, 'reasonable service.' We should desire nothing else but to be found loyal to the Lord.
God's Word is not only perfect, but it should also be something we all want to be real and true in our lives.
I believe most who would take the time to read this truly believe God's Word is completely true; but for some reason, many take the attitude that while It is true, it's beyond our capability to do it and therefore we accept a mediocre Christianity. As long as we go to church most of the time and give, we consider ourselves o.k. As long as our kids don't grow up to kill anybody and they go to some kind of church periodically and have a home and a good job, we did all right as parents. There is a word in Revelation that describes this (and it's not loyalty)-lukewarm; and it makes God sick.
God said "Be ye holy; for I am holy." (1 Peter 1:16). I understand that I can't be as holy as God now-but God desires that I strive to be, and therefore I should.
We must not teach our young people to be or accept being "pretty much" or "somewhat" a good Christian, but rather teach them to strive to be completely faithful to the Lord in obedience to His Word.
If His Word is Perfect-and it is-then we should want it-with all our hearts-to be real and true in our lives...completely.

He had this testimony, that he pleased God

The above title is taken from Hebrews 11:5 in reference to a well-known Old Testament hero, Enoch. Most remember Enoch as the man who never died; but more important to understand is the cause behind this miracle. According to the verse, it was because he pleased God. So how did he please God? In Genesis 5:22-24, it was that he walked with God, apparently not a common practice in those days; to be honest, not a common practice in our day either. In spite of all of our knowledge and ability and programs and everything else "Christian", we spend more time convincing ourselves of our spirituality, than spending it with God. It is he that changes people, it is He that heals the hurt, yet we tend to keep trying more and more of the world's methods to accomplish God's work.
The results from polling our youth showed a trend that seems to unfortunately be growing among independent Baptists - treating Christianity as a ritual to be performed instead of a relationship to be pursued. If we polled the adults from these same churches, would we find much difference in result? We have come a long way from our predecessors. Today's Baptists are known for three things - eating at every gathering, always being late, and never wanting to change. In other words we're bordering on gluttony, tardiness, and stubbornness. In truth, it should be just the opposite - we should be known for the prayers we see answered as a result of fasting, always in a hurry to be on time, and always looking for areas in our life that need change. Enoch is a great example of this. Reading Genesis 5:22 it says that Enoch walked with God after he begat Methusaleh. Why would it word it that way? Most commentaries believe that the meaning of Methusaleh's name had something to do with the flood. This apparently shook Enoch up enough that he turned his life around. Was he a wicked man before this? The Bible doesn't say, but just being a good person doesn't mean you walk with God. In fact, the closer you get to God, the more wicked that you see yourself. Do our young people see change in us? Or are we to proud to admit that the way we were was not pleasing to God, so we just trudge on forward never stopping to realize that the proud hard heart we turn towards God is going to develop in our children as well, no matter how many Christian things we involve them in? The Bible is clear to warn us not to grieve or quench the Spirit of God who dwells in us. Having a walk with God is not something we can fake, nor is it something that happens by accident. It is, however, something that will evident enough in the life of the believer that we won't need to convince anyone of it's reality.
Enoch had this testimony, that he pleased God. Each one of us also has a testimony - what's yours?